Ouch. My face.

Llewellyn Tarot 

This is how I feel today. Yesterday somehow I managed to hurt my shoulder while taking a bath. When I got in the bath, my shoulder didn't hurt, when I got out, it hurt like heck. Don't ask me. I didn't do any odd reaching or twisting, I didn't get out of the tub funny, it just hurts. Right across the top, the collarbone and trapezius area. I've taken ibuprofen and will be careful today. This is all getting a little tiresome.

Last month, I spent a fortune on some new workout DVDs, and then more money when they got nabbed by customs and I had to pay £20 extra just to get them from the Post Office. I've done two of them, once each. Last one was first week of November.

I was looking at myself in my bathrobe yesterday. The belt on my bathrobe keeps getting shorter, you know what I mean? Gosh, I've gotten fat again. Fat and mushy and my back and shoulders hurt. How bad does it have to get before I take some action? And the real question, am I going to wait until it's too late before I do something? The day will come when I won't be physically able to do the things that I am refusing to do today. The day will come when I wish I could do what I refuse to do now. And that day is not going to announce its arrival, it's not going to mark the diary for me. Once it comes, that's it. I should do a little something today. It doesn't have to be a lot. Just something.

Maybe some yoga. Super gentle and intelligent yoga.

Wait a minute. CBT kicking in. 'I should do something today.' Remove the should. Change should statements to 'desire to'.

I desire to do a little yoga today. I desire to do some yoga today. I desire to. :)

Wake up, close mouth, enjoy the day for what it is

Llewellyn Tarot, Anna-Marie Ferguson

The Judgement card in the Llewellyn Tarot, which is based on Welsh mythology, depicts the 'Snowdon Sleepers'. The legend holds that Arthur's battle with Mordred took place in the shadow of Snowdon, and that when he was wounded, his knights carried him to a cave where they sleep on, waiting for the time when the horn will be sounded three times, and they will rise again. It does look like someone is about to blow the horn.

This is slightly different from the traditional RWS image, in which the horn has already been sounded and the dead are rising from their tombs.

What horn has been sounded, or is about to be sounded, in my life today? What am I waking up to, or about to be waking up to?

Let's see what Lenormand can tell me. I'm using the TABI Lenormand to answer the above question with a 3-card draw:

TABI Lenormand

And I've drawn Woman + Snake + Flowers. The TABI Lenormand does not include playing card insets, but I recall that Woman is Ace of Spades, Snake is Queen of Clubs and Flowers is Queen of Spades.

Woman + Snake + Flowers = 

Woman complicates gift.
OR
Woman complicates etiquette/good manners.
OR
Woman hurts on a personal level self image.

Ace of Spades + Queen of Clubs + Queen of Spades =

All black cards = negativity
Two black queens = gossip (source Caitlin Matthews 'Complete Lenormand Handbook')

Interpretation
Today I will have opportunities to wake up to the ways in which I overthink or over-complicate what is really a good thing, often through my words. I will have the chance to realise how my behaviour and words can hurt on a personal level, both myself and others. I would do well to wake up to good manners and appreciate my gifts instead of looking for things to criticize about myself, my life, and others.

This is a daily draw, so these things will be very subtle, but just the turn of a phrase or a random thought can make a big difference.

Let sleeping kings lie

The Llewellyn Tarot by Anna-Marie Ferguson (Llewellyn 1995)

Today we have Judgement, and the card is a departure from tradition. Here we see the 'Welsh sleepers,' amongst them King Arthur, not quite dead but more in a state of suspended animation, waiting for the call to rise up and fight once again. At the top of the stairs you see a man standing by a horn hanging from the ceiling. This is the horn that will wake the sleepers.

Who knows why I have drawn this today, the day of the London Tarot Festival. I've just renewed my interest in tarot after a long hiatus, so maybe today's events will be my call to return to the world of tarot fully. Or maybe I'll fall asleep on the train and miss my stop.

Hope you all have a great weekend!

Four of Cups

The Llewellyn Tarot by Anna-Marie Ferguson (Llewellyn 1995)

I have really been enjoying the water colour artwork of the Llewellyn Tarot this week. It's a lovely deck. I even like the wide borders; they seem in keeping with the art. I just wish the deck were even bigger than it is. The art's so beautiful, I'd like to get a closer look at it.

This is the Four of Cups, which the companion book assigns the traditional contemporary meaning of 'discontent and isolation'. However, it does add the hopeful note: 'It is an encouraging card, indicating help that seems to be divine intervention ensuring one has all the cups one needs.'

I don't feel particularly discouraged today; the weather has cooled off and I get to leave work at 3.30 today, then tomorrow I'm off to the London Tarot Festival and will see a friend I haven't seen in -- a year? Time flies. It could be that work will be a bit trying today, as it often is. This card could be a wider picture of my life, showing that things in general are just looking up, despite a gloom that has hung over it for quite a while.

I followed the advice of yesterday's 7 of Wands and submitted my application for the post. If I get the job, we will move to a new town. I could commute by train but it would be a long commute and costly.  I've lived in this town for 13 years, and have worked in the same job for 11 years (in November). It would be nice to move to a new place and work in a new place, but if I don't get the job, that will be okay, too.

We'll just have to wait and see if any 4 of Cups feelings arise today.

Go for it -- Seven of Wands

The Llewellyn Tarot by Anna-Marie Ferguson (Llewellyn 1995)

I drew the Queen of Cups again today, so I decided draw a different card for the blog, and got Seven of Wands. I like that this guy is standing at the top of waterfall against a blazing orange sky -- it makes me think of seeking relief from the heat! Hopefully today will be cooler.

My personal key phrase for this card is 'proving oneself.' I've been working on a job application, and that always entails a feeling of doing that.

The companion says, 'Portends a good time to hazard a gamble. Though the odds may seem against you, there are advantages to your position.' That to me seems like encouragement to submit my application for the post and just go for it. The competition for the post may seem fierce, but I may have things to offer that perhaps some others don't. The reversed meaning is listed as, 'Danger in doing nothing. A warning to take action of any sort.' And again, that suggests to me that if I don't apply for this post, I will regret it when I find out who did get it, and think to myself, 'Hey, I could do as good a job as they can!'

So I guess today will be the day I send in my application.

Cool me off, lady

The Llewellyn Tarot by Anna-Marie Ferguson (Llewellyn 1995)

It's the Queen of Cups today. I tell you I wish I were sitting in a chair in the midst of the wash and spray of the sea! It's too hot here -- we hates it, we hates it, we hates it forever! Today it is meant to get up to 30 C (that's 86 F). Now, I know where I come from, this is the temperature in late March, but I don't live where I come from anymore and furthermore virtually no one has air conditioning (including my workplace) and it is too hot! I hope this heat wave passes quickly. Me no likey, not at all.

Anyway, today's watery Queen of Cups reminds me to exercise some compassion and empathy today -- and that includes for myself. Tempers could fray in this heat, especially mine. Yesterday for example, I had a bad moment when I learned that a course I've gone on is incomplete, that I not only have one more paper to write for it, but I also have several papers that need revision. My first instinct was to just say, 'Screw this' and tell them to fail me. After all, earning this certificate will have no effect whatsoever on my pay or my position. When I signed up for this course, my colleagues all said, 'That sounds like a lot of work for nothing,' and guess what. It's turned out to be a lot of work for nothing. I can say it's for personal growth, but right now it just feels like a big bloody inconvenience and burden, a whip I made for my own back. So, I could do with some cool, watery thoughts from the Queen of Cups to help me explore my emotions and get them under control so I can make a rational decision about what to do. I wrote to the company and asked if I could have an extension until the end of November, and they are okay with that. So maybe after the rush + short staff of summer is over, when the weather is back to normal, I will feel more like dealing with doing something I hate -- facing the fact that I have not performed 'perfectly' and work has been sent back to me with RED MARKS to do over. (I hate not getting things right the first time.)