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Friday, 29 May 2015

I am not a victim

Day before yesterday something happened at work; I have been blowing it out of all proportion in my mind. I will make myself sick if I don't do something to stop this in its tracks. I thought I'd take this to Oracle of the Shapeshifters (Blue Angel, 2011).

First of all, I started it. That makes me feel guilty. What I said needed saying, but probably not at that moment or in that way. The person in question and I just need to sit down to talk it through, but the bottom line is, changes need to be made to some fundamental practices. As with anything, it's all in the delivery. And the timing! It's pretty obvious how much I'm overthinking this, so let's draw some cards.

What is the message for me about this, my feelings about it, and how to deal with it? 

'You feel sluggish, tired and very much like you are no one special. I am here to tell you you are special, but you have grown too large for this safe haven. Now it is time to move on. It will be worth the time of initial discomfort, for a great and unknown truth about your potential will be revealed as the result.'

True, I do feel very tired lately, as I've said over and over. I guess it's saying I've kept my head down long enough, some of these things had to come out at some time, and this was as good a starting point as any (though it could have gone better!). The point is what I do next with it, not what happened in the past.

'She (Artemis) will insist you go deep into the wilds, to leave your comforts behind...and that you learn how strong you can be.'

The second card reminds me that I'm not going to die, no matter what happens. And no matter what happens, reality will not be nearly as bad as my overthinking makes it. Things might be bad, but not the end of the world. (REBT technique!)

'While people have mistaken you for a pushover, you are a strong person who cannot be stopped. Take a stand, because it is now time to be firm and decisive. No backing down. Someone stands with you. You do not face this alone.'

And finally that last bit certainly rings true. I haven't show much assertiveness yet, but as the companion book says, 'It is now time to be firm and decisive.' I do love the confidence exuding from this Little Red Riding Hood card. I think it's going on my altar for the week. ... Edited to add--


  1. Ha ha, on my secret account I had that 'I Am Not A Victim' as my avatar - love the 'tude!

    Good luck with standing up for what is right, and what you need. And even better luck finding a way to do it that will remove the tension - as you say, timing and delivery are an art :)

    1. I think I'm not too bad at taking a stand for what is right or what I need. I need good luck in communicating this in a compassionate way and with taking the other person's point of view into account, and considering how their needs can be met while still guiding her toward the target. 'Suck it up and do it' is my default mode for myself and I tend to apply it to everyone else, too.

    2. Yes, that's a good thing to realise - that you're not just being confrontational, that you apply the same standards to yourself :) Doesn't mean they're right for you or for others all the time, but at least you're no hypocrite!

  2. This is nice. Yes, the Little Red Riding card has a lovely, fierce-yet-quiet confidence and strength. In fact the line of cards, in terms of the images, looks like a process from A to B to C. It's great.

    1. Wow, I did not notice the progression from mournful to fierce! Well spotted! :)