I am not a victim

Day before yesterday something happened at work; I have been blowing it out of all proportion in my mind. I will make myself sick if I don't do something to stop this in its tracks. I thought I'd take this to Oracle of the Shapeshifters (Blue Angel, 2011).

First of all, I started it. That makes me feel guilty. What I said needed saying, but probably not at that moment or in that way. The person in question and I just need to sit down to talk it through, but the bottom line is, changes need to be made to some fundamental practices. As with anything, it's all in the delivery. And the timing! It's pretty obvious how much I'm overthinking this, so let's draw some cards.

What is the message for me about this, my feelings about it, and how to deal with it? 

'You feel sluggish, tired and very much like you are no one special. I am here to tell you you are special, but you have grown too large for this safe haven. Now it is time to move on. It will be worth the time of initial discomfort, for a great and unknown truth about your potential will be revealed as the result.'

True, I do feel very tired lately, as I've said over and over. I guess it's saying I've kept my head down long enough, some of these things had to come out at some time, and this was as good a starting point as any (though it could have gone better!). The point is what I do next with it, not what happened in the past.

'She (Artemis) will insist you go deep into the wilds, to leave your comforts behind...and that you learn how strong you can be.'

The second card reminds me that I'm not going to die, no matter what happens. And no matter what happens, reality will not be nearly as bad as my overthinking makes it. Things might be bad, but not the end of the world. (REBT technique!)

'While people have mistaken you for a pushover, you are a strong person who cannot be stopped. Take a stand, because it is now time to be firm and decisive. No backing down. Someone stands with you. You do not face this alone.'

And finally that last bit certainly rings true. I haven't show much assertiveness yet, but as the companion book says, 'It is now time to be firm and decisive.' I do love the confidence exuding from this Little Red Riding Hood card. I think it's going on my altar for the week. ... Edited to add--

Divination 3 x 3 x 3

My friend Chloe at Inner Whispers has done a You Tube in which she shares her three favourite divinatory tools and invites us to do the same: tarot, oracle, Lenormand/other. After much deliberation, I have selected my 3 x 3 x 3. Here they are in random order:

Top Three Tarot Decks 

1986 Blue Box Thoth Tarot

My journey with the wonderful Thoth Tarot has been chronicled on this blog. If you look on the right side bar and click on 'One Deck Wonder: Thoth' you can read all about it.

I have three copies of this deck. My first copy was the small purple box Thoth, purchased for a workshop at a TABI Tarot Convention. Unfortunately, I couldn't hear the presenter (she wasn't on mike) and the people around me all had a negative reaction to the deck, which reinforced my perception of it as cold and unreadable.

When I at last decided to confront my fear and distaste for the deck, I made a commitment to using it exclusively for a time. I did all my blogging with it, my personal readings with it, and my client readings with it. I tried to ready Crowley's guidebook, The Book of Thoth, but found it impenetrable. I bought Tarot: Mirror of the Soul by Gerd Ziegler, but even with my limited knowledge, I knew his was an idiosyncratic and unhelpful take on the deck. Finally, I found Lon Milo DuQuette's book Understanding Aleister Crowley's Thoth Tarot and I was on my way.

If this were the only tarot deck in the world, it could easily keep you busy for a lifetime.

Yellow Box The Rider Tarot Deck 

Edward Arthur Waite and Pamela Colman Smith created what is now the classic tarot deck, and it is available in all sorts of colorations. There are clones (exact same images but with lines and coloring revised) and their are 'RWS-based' decks (too many to count! - Druidcraft, Anna K Tarot, Hudes, Aquarian, just so many). But when I have a tough question or am reading for a client and want to be able to answer clearly and confidently, the old standard yellow box Rider is just the ticket. Could not do without it.

Morgan Greer Tarot (US Games 1979)

This deck is special to me because it was the third deck I ever bought. It is a RWS-based deck, notable in its day for being borderless. It is the deck I turn to even before my yellow box Rider (or other RWS clones). It's not particularly beautiful, but I like it. The backs have no relation to the fronts in style or coloring and not reversible, but I like it. It's full of mustachioed men like something from 'The Joy of Sex', but I like it. It's a workhorse of a deck, shuffles like a dream, I've had it from the start and I like it.

(Honorable Mention: Druidcraft
I have Druidcraft and I used it a lot for years, but I hardly ever pick it now. I won't get rid of it though. However, I hardly ever use it so I can't really say it's a favourite.)

Top Three Oracles
I have to be honest and say most of my oracles were bought either to use as altar decorations or just totally on a whim. I do occasionally use a few of them for divination and here they are:

Morgan's Tarot (Morgan Robbins)
Read my introduction to this fabulous oracle here: 10,000 Words in a Cardboard Box. And it gives wonderful readings such as this: Have you ever been Biff Tannened?

I love this deck. Here are a few of my favourite cards:

Teen Oracle (Cinnamon Crow Dixon)

I learned about this oracle from Steven Bright of Tiferet Tarot. It is a very straightforward deck when you just want an answer. Black and white images with red text give it a 'you can't ignore me when I'm being this literal' feeling, and cards are simple as: Stop, Speak, and Relax.



Oracle of the Shapeshifters (Lucy Cavendish and Jasmine Becket-Griffith)

I may be the only person in the world who actively dislikes the artwork of Jasmine Becket-Griffith. I do not like these cards. I don't like any of her work. I do not like these bug-eyed, button-nosed, big-headed girls who like aliens suffering from fetal alcohol syndrome. BUT...Lucy Cavendish must be some sort of world-class witch because I have never used a more uncannily accurate oracle. For me, the book is indispensable. The cards are useless without it, and in fact, I often don't bother with the cards but just use the book, opening it at a random page instead of drawing from the deck.


Lenormand and other 
I do not use any 'other' types of divination, having given up dealings with runes, crystals, herbalism, and such like. I'm pure cartomancy these days. Here are my three favourite Lennies and 'other':

Esmeralda Lenormand

I didn't even know about this deck; it was a gift from a friend, and has become my favourite Lenormand. I use it for all my client readings and it is my go-to for my own personal Lennie readings as well. I love the rich colours and textures, and the little prompts and icons. All the information you need is right there on the card, and when laid out in a grand tableau, they look like a glorious patchwork quilt.



Titania's Fortune Cards
This was my first Lenormand, before I had even heard the word 'Lenormand'. If you buy it, ignore the companion book. It bears no relation to any traditional Lenormand system and will only confuse you. (I actually threw mine away.) They have a crazy, 'flashing colour' thing going on with them, making them look like lurid photo negatives. You get a sort of tatwa thing going when you use them. Here's a draw I did with them: Lenormand Daily Draw.

Psycards

The Psycards are a set of 40 cards inspired by Carl Jung's work, and based on the principle of 'archetypes'. I used to have the book but I traded that set, then a few years later decided I wanted the cards back and bought the deck only. It's okay, the book is not really needed.

Here's a reading I did with Psycards: Emperor Energy -- Not Welcome Lately.




Well, that was exhausting. :)

I hope you enjoyed reading about my favourite decks. What are your faves? I'd love to hear! If you do a You Tube or write a blog, please link to it in comments below. :D