Poor me. Whatever shall I do.

Today's card from Joanna Powell Colbert's Gaian Tarot (Llewellyn 2011) is 5 of Earth. I did actually draw this card for today's blog entry, but it was also the card in the 'underlying' position in yesterday's draw as well. It's a good representation of what's going on with me lately.

Let's take a close look. The woods. Autumn. Leaves blowing about in what looks like icy rain. There seems to be the beginnings of some snow in that precipitation. Bare twigs and stobbies sticking up everywhere. What looks like a pile of debris turns out to be a shelter constructed by the young man huddled inside. He looks pretty darn cold, probably already wet. It's going to be a long night...

I get the feeling, though, that he's not that lost. I don't know why, but there's just a sense that on the other side of those trees, there's a motorway or the edge of the suburbs. He's actually in a clearing, so it's likely he's made that shelter from some scrub that the owner of this land had already piled up. I think he's a short walk from other people, from warmth, from safety, from light and life. But for some reason, he's come out here to the woods and decided to sleep rough. Why? Why does he feel like this is his best option, perhaps his only option? Is it really? Has he really been shunned? Or is he just feeling sorry for himself? Maybe he's got it in his head that suffering here in the snowy rain will show everyone...somehow this is getting them back. I'll just sleep out here in the rough and catch a big bad cold, that'll show 'em! He's huddling up in a vividly blue fleece jumper (or maybe a blanket), and it looks like he's got a watch or a bracelet on his wrist...I don't think he's actually all that destitute. It's all in his head. But of course, it's certainly true that once something is in your head, it can be pretty darn powerful and take you right over.

Radiant Rider Waite (US Games 2003),  Tarot of the Old Path (US Games 1990), Vanessa Tarot (US Games 2007)

The 5 of Coins/Pentacles/Earth in the RWS system always denotes a time of material uncertainty and instability. It represents feeling unsafe, insecure, uncared for, left out, not knowing what is going to happen to your livelihood, your finances, your home, your health. It can represent feeling shunned or ignored. And it can also represent the worry about these things happening when they actually haven't.

Thoth Tarot (US Games 2006)

When you compare the Gaian Tarot's 5 of Earth to the 5 of Coins/Pentacles/Disks in other decks, you'd have to say the imagery is tame. I don't believe there is any danger at all of the lad in Gaian's 5 of Earth actually freezing to death. In fact, I'd say it's likely he'll rise early the next morning and brush the leaves off himself and tromp over to an International House of Pancakes for breakfast. That doesn't mean he isn't feeling what he feels, though, or that his feelings aren't valid or that they aren't affecting his life in profound ways. There is a sense, though, that this is a phase that will pass, whereas there is more of a sense of acute danger in some other 5 of Coins cards. That just has to do with the overall tone of the Gaian deck. This deck has a strong energy that no matter what may happen to us or what is going on with us, everything is going to turn out all right. Even the negative cards have an underlying air of a benevolent and even slightly amused parental presence watching over us. Well...it is called the Gaian Tarot!

It's quite obvious for my reading what this points to. I'm under threat of redundancy and we won't know until the end of October what is going on. So that is a worry for sure; it's always there lately, and that's why this card turned up in the 'underlying' position in my spread.

I know whatever happens, everything's going to be all right.