Reading using directionality and reversals

Pamela Colman Smith Commemorative Tarot  

This is the reading I've been exploring in my journal for the last few days. I'd drawn cards of the number 5 two days in a row (not pictured). Five being associated with finding balance, I asked 'What is attempting to find balance in my life right now? What is out of balance? and What is maintaining equilibrium?' I drew Magician Rx, Strength, Star.

So, a weakened Magician is attempting to find balance right now. Personal power is not being used to bring my needs into reality. I am not identifying my true needs. Strength has come forward as what is out of balance right now -- again a card of personal power and taking the bull by the horns (or lion by the jaw). The Star has maintained equilibrium -- hope has not been lost. I have felt all along that there is plenty of time to address my issues. I just haven't done anything about them. (The reason why is seen in 9 of Pentacles later).

To rectify the reversed Magician, I drew Hermit and placed it above Magician. I can identify my true needs and establish balance in my personal power within myself, or with the help of a mentor, or in a spiritual tradition or practice. wondering what the Hermit's lamp was lighting, I drew another card to see what was in his line of sight. Queen of Cups. Her posture echoes that of the Hermit -- both facing to the left, both intent upon the item they are holding, for the Hermit, the lamp of enlightenment, for the Queen it's the world's craziest cup, shaped like the Ark of the Covenant with the seraphim on either side (if the Ark of the Covenant were made of spare pipe and hood ornaments nicked from the cars of pimps in Starsky and Hutch.)  Queen of Cups is Water of Water -- and so was the daily card that prompted this draw (not in the photo), 5 of Cups, another Water of Water card. This imbalance or disturbance is in the realm of emotions and relationships and personal power.

 Looking at the Queen of Cups and Hermit makes one long to know what is in their line of sight -- so I drew another card to see what they are looking at and got 8 of Cups reversed. Another Water of Water card! 8 of Cups is recognition of time to move on; reversed suggests confusion or delay in making that move.

How can I overcome this confusion, find some clarity? I drew a card to rectify the 8 of Cups reversed and got -- King of Swords reversed! Fire of Air, reversed. I am Aquarius, and King of Swords is the card associated with Aquarius. He's sort of my default setting. But here, to overcome my confusion about what needs looking at and changing, I can't do it through King of Swords, but through King of Swords reversed. Usually, I tend to be rational about things but now that is not what is needed. To clarify this, I remembered a technique of identifying reversed court cards by identifying their elemental opposite. If King of Swords is Fire of Air, his opposite would be Air of Fire --Knight of Wands!

Knight of Wands, that maker of 'down and dirty' plans, that explorer and adventurer, that risk taker! Knight of Wands? How the heck do I access Knight of Wands energy when I don't even feel that I remotely have it right now?

I took the card out of the pack and looked at it for a while. I noticed the pyramids in the background. The Knight of Wands is not drawing energy from his surroundings, which are dry and barren. His passion is inside him. So it must be somewhere inside of me, even when there is nothing in my environment or situation to feed it. What is the Knight of Wands charging toward? What is he charging away from?

I put the card back in the pack and shuffled to find out which cards he would end up between. I found the Knight of Wands and laid him out with the cards on either side of him: Chariot, Knight of Wands, 9 of Pentacles.

The Knight of Wands is moving away from 9 of Pentacles (Air of Earth), whose energy and line of sight are directed away from him (though her body posture is still open to his direction). Her attention is definitely elsewhere, focused on her bird (Air) of prey (Earth). As Air of Earth, she contemplates the material/physical realm. Her satisfaction with her status quo is evident. She is complacent, self-congratulatory, self-satisfied. These are not bad things, but the way she spends her leisure time may no longer be balanced -- too long standing still. Too long watching others move (her bird of prey, which she will presumably set loose to watch fly).

How does the Knight of Wands move me from too much physical luxury? What does he move me toward? The Chariot, a Water card, associated with Cancer and the Moon. Okay, so the Water of Water cards led me to draw a variety of Water cards that have laid me a path to -- a Water major! The emotional plane is dominant in this issue. Not the material plane or the logical plane, but the emotional plane, and how to take action with balanced emotions.

'Cancer is the gateway to incarnation, as Capricorn (its opposite) is the gateway to ascension. Cancer's energy guides us to learn the distinctions of our emotional and logical reasoning so we can recognise how they don't always agree' - agent64.com/cancer-the-chariot

Like a Cancerian crab, the Chariot has a hard shell and a soft centre -- appearing tough on the outside but deep down quite sensitive and vulnerable.

The Chariot card is full of this tension between opposing forces: black and white sphinxes, male and female, facing in opposite directions, meant to be pulling the chariot but not hitched to it and lying down (they seem ambivalent), the lingam and yoni on the shield (which to me looks like a top that spins in place but doesn't actually get anywhere), the chariot is a conveyance but is built like a cube of concrete, no reins and no motion in the charioteer who is encased in the concrete cube (he seems ambivalent), chariots are often associated with the sun ('chariots of fire') but this one is decorated with moons and starry night skies and is associated with the moon.

In other words, the Knight of Wands is me progressing, through my own inner drive,  toward a state of balance created by acknowledging that there is always a state of perpetual tension, and harnessing that tension to drive my life forward. I have been looking for balance rather than acknowledging constant tension. In fact, I have turned from acknowledgement of tension, turned from the areas that need attention (Water and Fire) and settled into some complacent wallowing in the material realm. And there I've wallowed for quite some time.

'To be useful, either to herself or any higher purpose, she had to use her ambivalence as a driving force in her life, a force that would power the Chariot' (Rachel Pollack, The Forest of Souls, 75).

Much to ponder. The Chariot and the Knight of Wands are going on my altar.

Some of these techniques were shared by Caitlin Matthews in a session at the UK Tarot Conference, October 2015. A webinar and DVD of line of sight and rectifying reversals, etc,  may be available at some point. Visit her website at Hallowquest.

Other techniques seen herein have been shared by Alison Cross in TABI conferences, by Benebell Wen in her book Holistic Tarot, and many others.

Must be court week - Knight of Coins - Fountain Tarot

Fountain Tarot, 2014 

You gotta love a tarot card that incorporates lense flare. Well, you don't have to, but I do. (JJ Abrams would probably get excited by it, too. If you don't get that, don't worry about it, it's a movie geek reference.)

I'm accustomed to seeing the Knight of Pentacles with his big sturdy horse and heavy armour, and that helps promote the image of him as slow and plodding. But he's not just those things, and this card helps bring out other qualities. The Knight of Pentacles is Air of Earth. He contemplates the physical realm. We can get a strong feel for that aspect in this card from the Fountain Tarot (2014).

Stargate glyph

Here we see the Knight of Pentacles wearing green robes. It appears to me that he stands in the arched doorway of an atrium. Outside, there is more greenery, and a mountain or pyramid. If it is a pyramid, then the circle of the sun is directly above it. It is from this sun that the fantastic rays beam down upon our knight. This reminds me of the glyph from the movie 'Stargate'. In the movie, this glyph represents 'point of origin' and symbolises earth. That works for me. If it's a more ancient symbol, I don't know about it. As far as I know, this particular glyph is from a film. So we have the Knight of Pentacles, dressed in green, surrounded by green plants and trees, contemplating a symbol of the earth element, and basking in the light from the source of life, under the Stargate glyph symbolising the planet earth. That's pretty cool, and certainly moves us away from the plodding, rather 'thick' and slow image associated with the RWS card. This knight takes his time, but it's because he's thoughtful and meditative (Air).

I like him.

The Knight of Pentacles is a Cognitive Behaviour Therapist

Sirian Starseed 

I bought a yoga journal yesterday, DailyGreatness Yoga Journal: Your Masterplan for a Beautifully Conscious Life.  It's a lovely book and can be a great tool for developing good habits. I hesitated about purchasing it because of 1) the price tag and 2) my tendencies to become OCD about this sort of thing. A book like this panders to the colour-coded list maker type, which I certainly am. It's the follow-through where I trip up, and in the last few months of working with Cognitive Behaviour techniques, I'm beginning to understand why.

I might as well just tell you about the type of CBT I've been exploring. It's called Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy, and it's very illuminating.

According to REBT, we disturb ourselves by making three irrational demands of life. We are not aware that we hold these demands, but they are the usual underlying cause of disturbance:

1. The demand that we perform well or outstandingly at all times.
2. The demand for others to treat us nicely, considerately or fairly at all times.
3. The demand for life to be comfortable and hassle-free at all times.

(These are irrational demands, obviously, but think about it. You can probably trace most of your unsettledness, unhappiness, anger, anxiety, depression, etc, back to one or all of these three. I have no idea why we do this.)

This style of cognitive behaviour therapy does not seek to put a positive spin on everything that happens to you or on how you feel, but to help you understand that by taking the demand out of your thinking and increasing your frustration tolerance to experiences you don't like, you can develop confidence and increase your chance of success.

Some of us seem to have these coping skills naturally, others of us need to develop them. For some of us, to greater or lesser degrees, when the above unconscious demands are not met, we tend to have one or all of the following three reactions:

1. 'Awfulizing' - the event is not just bad, it is the worst thing that has ever happened in the history of the universe and there is nothing that could be worse. We say things like - It is a disaster. It is the end of the world. It is a catastophe. It is horrible/awful/terrible.

2. Low Frustration Tolerance (LFT) - a belief that underestimates your ability to cope. We say things like - It is intolerable. I can't take this. I cannot stand this. It is too hard.

3. Self-damning - judging yourself in a globally dismissive, totally negative way. We say things like - I am a loser. I am a failure. I am weak. I am stupid. I am worthless. I am useless. I am an idiot.

REBT offers three strategies to counter the above reactions:

1. Reality check - Is it a natural law, like gravity? Is there any evidence to support it, as in the kind of evidence that supports the existence of gravity?

2. Common sense - Is it logical to state this?

3. Helpful - Is this belief helpful to the situation?

Then we can turn the beliefs around to modified statements, statements that do not deny the reality that what you are going through is not fun for you (I appreciate that):

'It would be bad if --------but it is not the end of the world.'

'It would be very difficult if ----------but I can live through it. It will not kill me.'

'I don't like the fact that --------- but that does not make me a failure as a human being. I remain worthwhile and fallible.'

So...there are these blank pages in the yoga journal that ask me to write all this stuff down, make a mission statement, make a 90-day forward plan. I looked at the pages and I started to get a bit freaked out. Why? Because of my demand on myself to perform outstandingly at all times. I must fill the pages in perfectly, or I cannot fill them in at all. Why?

Because If I don't fill these pages out perfectly, it would be a disaster. I would ruin the book. I would have wasted my money. It would be the worst thing that could possible happen! And if I mess up the book, if I don't get it right, I couldn't cope with that. The guilt of buying such a nice book and not being able to use it properly would make me feel terrible. I couldn't cope with that. And isn't this just the way I always end up - I fail at everything, because I am useless and stupid and I can't do anything right. I might as well just forget the whole thing because I will surely not use it properly for the year anyway.

Because filling out this book should be easy. It's something I want to do, so it should be easy. If it isn't easy, that would be horrible! I cannot cope with things that are not easy. I cannot deal with them. If it isn't easy for me, it means I am too stupid to do it and shouldn't have even bought the book.

Now -- do you see how that thinking went straight through the REBT pattern???? And do you see how it can come about that a person would buy a journal and then be afraid to write in it?

You know, you don't sit and literally think all these things. They are like flashes and pangs of emotion, not verbalised. And it can all flash through you in a matter of seconds.

But, wait.

There is no truth in the belief that I would ruin the book and have wasted my money if I don't get it perfect. There is no law that says a book must be filled in perfectly. Also, it is true that I may feel bad about not filling in the book perfectly, but it is not true that I cannot cope with that. I can bear it. I will not break, fall apart or die -- it is nonsensical to feel that disaster will befall me if I do not fill in the book perfectly. Also, if I don't know what to write in the journal, it makes no sense to conclude that I therefore know nothing and that I am useless, stupid and a failure. The truth of the matter is, I simply don't know what to write. It is not helpful to hold the beliefs that the book must be perfect, that I cannot bear it if I don't write the 'right' thing, and that I am a failure - these beliefs create the anxiety that prevents me from taking any action at all.

And there is no truth in the belief that filling in the book should be easy. There is no evidence that life has to be easy and comfortable. There is no universal law saying that filling in a book should be easy. It is perfectly reasonable to want things to be easy, however it does not follow that just because you wish it, it should be so. It is common sense to accept the fact that while I may want something to be so -- in this case, goal-setting should be easy -- that doesn't mean it has to be so. (Just because we want it to be a sunny day doesn't mean the sun must shine, does it?)  The belief that goal-setting should be easy is unhelpful. The demand provokes anxiety and leads to avoidance behaviour.

And so I can set healthier beliefs:

I want to fill in the new journal perfectly, but I don't have to. The fact that I may not fill it in perfectly is uncomfortable for me, but not the worst thing that could ever happen to me. It is frustrating, but I can bear it. I will not die.  It doesn't make me useless. It doesn't make me a failure. It doesn't mean that the rest of the book would then be ruined. I accept myself as a fallible person, and my worth does not depend on how I fill in the book.

These truer statements can also flash through you in a matter of seconds...but you will probably have to start challenging beliefs after the fact before you reach the point where you can do it automatically. (Unless, like some lucky people, you were born with or were taught the skill by the way you were raised).

I cannot tell you what a struggle it has been to make myself start writing in this book. The desire to avoid writing in it in order to avoid all the feelings and fears about it is very strong.

This morning I drew Adept of Crystals -- Knight of Pentacles. 'Take your time,' he said. 'Do things slowly. Work it out.'

Sir Pentacles, you've changed!

Chrysalis Tarot, Brooks & Sierra 2014

I've drawn a court card from Chrysalis Tarot today, 'The Illusionist' or Knight of Stones (aka Knight of Pentacles). I must admit, I find the court cards puzzling. They are conceived as a medieval 'troupe' of players which is a fun concept. It's just that I find that although the LWB claims that they correspond to traditional tarot courts, I don't find that to be the case, and particularly true of this card, Knight of Stones.

Now the Knight of Pentacles is a favourite of mine. I have blogged about him quite a bit. As I've said before, in my tarot world, the Knight of Pentacles is the firm, stable, slow-going, patient, hardworking, gentle-spirited, self-effacing one in the tarot courts. In the RWS image he is sitting firmly on his big, sturdy horse, well-rooted to the fertile earth, the sky awash with the glow of the life-giving sun, and bunches of lush greenery decorating himself and his horse's harness. He is well-grounded. 

I remember at the UK Tarot Conference a few years back, Rachel Pollack talked a bit about the Knight of Pentacles, how he is the responsible, sensible one who stands guard over his community, the person who is willing to take on the jobs no one else wants to do, the quiet one who understands the meaning of duty, takes his own time in making a decision or taking action. He's just a solid, nice guy. 

Then I draw Knight of Stones in Chrysalis Tarot and see a magician, and the LWB tells me he is 'spontaneous, confusing, a mystic' and that if I'm 'up for risky, raw adventure, follow his lead without reservation'. Who the heck is this guy? Because he's not the Knight of Pentacles. The LWB says the Illusionist's motto is 'nothing ventured, nothing gained'. The Knight of Pentacles I know would rather say, 'Slow and steady wins the race.' He is not a 'trickster', he is not 'filled with youthful exuberance'. I have no idea what's going on with this card. If the LWB said, 'we've created all new courts for you,' fair enough, but it says 'Our Troupe corresponds to traditional court cards'. Maybe that's just in name only, because I have looked at all the court cards and there are some stark anomalies. 

So which do I do, do I read according to the meaning conveyed by the LWB and the image of a magician, or do I read on my own understanding of the Knight of Pentacles? This is a decision you have to make when you get a deck that deviates from your normal tarot associations. Quite often I have ignored changes that don't work for me and just read cards according to the usual meanings I associate with cards (like with Tarot of Silicon Dawn, which finally drove me so bonkers I sold it. I mean, Pentacles as FIRE? I ask you!) Other times, such as with the Haindl, I cut the titles off and forgot about traditional court meanings entirely and just read according to what was on the card. So I don't know. As a single daily draw, I'm not sure what to make of this card. No doubt in a reading, it would become quickly apparent which way to go with the interpretation. 

For today I'll just go with what the book says (and chunter to myself about how it's not really the Knight of Pentacles). Well, I will admit that I agree with the LWB when it says the Illusionist is 'confusing.' CLEARLY I am not in the mood for 'risky raw adventure,' as just being confronted with this unexpected card meaning has made me a grumpy old cow. Apparently the appearance of the Illusionist is to spur me to action 'without a lot of confusing forethought' -- well I thought that was the sort of thing that helped you cross the street without getting run over, but never mind. This guy just sounds more like the Knight of Wands to me and I can't get past that. 

I'm going to go fume in the corner for a bit. See you tomorrow! 

Firmly planted

PCS Commemorative 

A long day today, my last opening and closing at the library for at least a year. The Knight of Pentacles from Pamela Coleman Smith Commemorative Tarot reminds me to pace myself and be thorough in all the jobs I turn my hands to today. It is a day for tying up loose ends. Rachel Pollack says the Knight of Pentacles is ' responsible, hardworking, uncomplaining' and Mary K Greer adds that he represents 'doing or teaching your accomplishments, using your knowledge.' I guess this shows that today is a day to try to pass on things I know to those who will be taking up my responsibilities over the next year. I ought to go around to the three people who have had my duties divided between them and make sure they know how to do these things and offer my tips, if they are interested.

Out of curiosity, I had a look in Yoav Ben-Dov's 'The Open Reading' to see what he has to say about the Knight of Coins:

'Advancing toward a goal that seems close at hand but somehow eludes our grasp. ...Constantly chasing after money, either due to a real need or because in this frame of mind one can never have enough.'

Now that is not an interpretation I have ever used for Knight of Pentacles, though of course in the Rider Waite Smith deck, the Knight is holding the pentacle, whereas in the Tarot de Marseilles, the giant coin float in the air in front of his face, which could, I suppose, lead to this alternate meaning.

Well, I'm certainly not chasing after money. And in my tarot world, the Knight of Pentacles is the firm, stable, slow-going, patient, hardworking, gentle-spirited, self-effacing one in the tarot courts. Sitting firmly on his big, sturdy horse, well-rooted to the fertile earth, the sky awash with the glow of the life-giving sun, and bunches of lush greenery decorating himself and his horse's harness. I don't think he's materialistic, I think he's grounded, and those are not even close to the same thing.

Slow and steady wins the race

Thoth Tarot

Nearly a year ago I drew this same card and christened him 'Lancelot du Nunchucks'. He's not really a knight, he's more of a king, because Crowley doesn't have kings in his Thoth deck.

I'm glad to see that today will be a slow and steady day. I have submitted the project I worked on last night, and I tried to be as steady and methodical in doing it as I could, to turn out an acceptable product. Now all we can do is watch and wait, not unlike the chap in this card.

Now that that is out of the way, maybe today would be a good day to investigate the state of my finances. I haven't done any close checking of my various accounts in a while so perhaps today would be a good day to do that. Though to be honest, I feel quite tired of frittering with details and maybe I will leave it. Maybe instead I will just tidy up some of the papers lying around here and see if I can at least find the folder in which I keep these things. That's a Knight of Disks thing to do, a chore having to do with the material or physical realm, that takes time and might be the sort of job that isn't considered 'fun' but that needs to be done. Good old dutiful Knight of Disks... I think that box is in the top of the closet...

Ancient Italian Tarot Pairs: Day 1

This week I'll be drawing two cards a day using the Ancient Italian Tarot (LoScarabeo). The deck is a reproduction of an Italian tarot from the 1880s, in a style known as Soprafino (a word meaning 'very refined').  I've decided to draw two cards a day using a popular variation on the 'Do this - don't do this' tarot spread: 'Embrace - Release.' For each day, the first card drawn is the advice of what I should embrace for the day, and the second is the advice for what should be let go.

So, today's draw is:

 The Tower                             Knight of Coins

Embrace the Tower. Release the Knight of Coins.

Well, that is a smack upside the head this morning. To embrace the unexpected, the unplanned for, the lightning strike coming out of the blue that shakes you to the very foundations. And to release good old Mr Faithful, the plodding planner who can never be hurried along.

Where exactly I'm meant to take that advice, of course cannot be said. The nature of the Tower precludes it. To try to second-guess or orchestrate a Tower event would be to take a Knight of Coins approach to it. Can't be done. So, all I can do today is be open and receptive to the chance to say 'Yes' to anything that I would normally say 'No' to.

Oh, the very idea fills me with trepidation! I am a world champion sayer of 'No'. I love routine and hate disruption. Just the extreme regularity of this blog ought to be evidence of that! I don't have a clue what the universe may offer me today, and I'm already girding up my loins to bellow 'NO' to it. I love the Knight of Coins, love his stability, his regularity, his confidence, his humility, his laconic and phlegmatic nature. He might not be exciting, but he's dependable. And you can't say that about the Tower -- well, it's dependable all right, you can depend on the fact that whatever the Tower brings is going to be mighty unsettling!

Okay, so my goal for the day is to watch out for any opportunity to say 'Yes', no matter how subtle, to something that I would ordinarily say 'No' to. *biting lip* Oh, man.

Long and winding road

This Knight of Pentacles looks very noble and alert. Sometimes the Knight of Pentacles looks a bit like a dullard, but in the Crystal Tarot (Permutt, CICO Books 2010), he appears to be on a mission. Obviously the Knight of Pentacles is a slow and steady kind of character, but the Permutt companion book looks at this from a slightly different perspective:

You are working in the right direction, but there is still quite a way to go. You will have to continue to be industrious to achieve your goals. The Knight of Pentacles signifies a responsible and consistent person--this may be you, or someone you seek help from.

So -- no phoning in sick today! Dang. And the self-improvement project I have been toying around with for a while now is a long, long way from finished, this card makes plain. I need to be the Knight of Pentacles to achieve it -- slow and steady.

The crystal assigned to this card is blue topaz. Crystal Well-Being says of blue topaz:

Blue Topaz can be useful for problem solving or sorting out muddled feeling and ideas. It can inspire and uplift and promote truth, honesty, openness and forgiveness. It can help you to discover your own inner riches and help you to find and attain your goals. 

And Sunny Ray says: 

Topaz helps in establishing a practical point of view when it comes to life in general. It is thought to be able to point in the direction of the most practical solution to any problem or situation. It helps us to walk the distance between point A and point B in our everyday life without losing time.

Well, I don't have anything made of blue topaz, so I will just have to imagine one today. It's meant to be good for clear communication (associated with throat chakra), balancing of mind and body, and brings patience. These are all Knight of Pentacles qualities. I imagine he doesn't talk much, but when he does, he doesn't play games or mess around. And he of all the courts certainly has an abundance of patience! 

Listening to moonlight

Wild Unknown Tarot, 2013

This is the Son (or Knight) of Pentacles from the Wild Unknown Tarot (2012). The Pentacle courts are all deer in this deck. I suppose it is a good choice. Deer have to be very in tune with their surroundings, as they have no real defenses--no fangs, no claws, no stinky spray like a skunk or pointy quills like a hedgehog. All they've got is their acute senses and very fleet feet.

The Son of Pentacles here does look like he's listening very closely, listening to the quiet hum of existence -- the sound of the wind in the leaves, the twigs snapping beneath his hooves, the breath going in and out of his nostrils, the very beat of his heart.

Does he hear the stars? Does he feel the light of the moon? Maybe he does. Who's to say? We won't hear or see a thing, but he will suddenly jerk his head up, alert and wide-eyed, turning to bound off into the safety of the trees while we're left standing dumbly, until the snake or the bear or the mountain lion lunge into our awareness, too close, too late.

We could all use a bit of the gifts of the Son of Pentacles. What do you need to tune into today?

Sit like a rock

Tarot of the Sidhe, 2010

Time to get back down to earth today with Maker Prince from Tarot of the Sidhe by Emily Carding. He is the Prince of Disks (Thoth), or Knight of Pentacles (RWS). He appears to me some kind of satyr, having horns on his head and the legs of a goat. The Maker Prince sits in rock pose (vajrasana), a yoga pose of sitting in a kneeling position on one's heels, feet and knees together. It is said to be a very grounding pose which also aids in digestion.

It seems appropriate that the Maker Prince would sit in such a pose, as he is possibly the most grounded and practical of the all the tarot courts. We see him in Tarot of the Sidhe depicted with elements of nature that echo his personal qualities. The trees, strong and slow-growing, are like his steadfast patience and slow pace. The dog represents his faithfulness and commitment to service. The hedgehog is his humble, retiring nature. The owl is his quiet wisdom, the butterfly represents the transformative potential of all these slow and patient qualities.