Can you give too much?

It seems redundant to keep writing, 'What a weird image,' but I truly can't think of anything else to say when I draw a card from Deviant Moon Tarot (US Games 2013). Today's card is 6 of Pentacles:

'Compassion for the plight of the dead has led a wealthy man into the cemetery. Meeting a soul who longs for the material world, the man offers one of his six pentacles in an open act of generosity'. ~ LWB, Patrick Valenza. 

Riiight, okay, that's weird.

I know, I know. The guy's got three legs. He's got one arm reaching from his chest like out of a first floor window. His other hands are coming out of his back. It's weird!

It gets weirder, though. According to the LWB, the textures of the clothing of the figures in this deck are taken from graveyards of eastern Long Island, and the architecture of the buildings in the cards comes from photography of a 'local abandoned insane asylum.' You what? That's pretty weird.

The Diviner

Shining Tribe Tarot, Pollack 2001

I've been thinking a lot lately about where I want to go with my tarot reading service. I have found that writing daily about tarot for this blog, working on my own with the cards in my personal practice, and doing email readings for clients on this site to be quite satisfactory for me. In fact I was featured for my low-key business model in this article. But now I'm ready to move more deeply into this business of helping people. I want to reach out more to others. I want to share the wisdom and insight of tarot to a wider audience. In short, I am ready to expand this enterprise. I have been journaling about it, visualising it, and setting intentions for it. Today I've drawn a card from Shining Tribe Tarot that features - no surprise - a diviner.

The diviner in 6 of Stones received insight from 5 sources of inspiration - a crystal ball, dice, cowry shells, ogham stick, and a rock whose natural markings create a rune. The sixth oracle is the diviner herself, for as Rachel Pollack says, we become part of whatever reading we perform, and the very act of divination changes us in profound ways.

I guess there aren't many people who think as a child, 'When I grow up I want to be a tarot reader.' I know I wasn't one of them, though I have always worked in the helping professions, counselling and liberal arts.  When I bought my first tarot deck, I had absolutely no idea that I would ever use the cards for anyone other than myself. I looked upon them as a meditation tool. I had no idea how endlessly complex and applicable they were to every possible permutation of the human experience. I certainly had no idea that I would one day read the cards for others, and that they would be helped enough by the readings to keep coming back for more.

I wonder if anyone other than a reader knows how much soul searching goes on in reading for another person. I myself consider it a tremendous responsibility and an honour to be involved in this way in the inner world of my customers. I take this responsibility very, very seriously. I work quite hard on the readings I provide by email. In my opinion, an email reading is in many ways superior to a live reading. I say this because I know how much energy I expend in trying to make, for lack of better word, a psychic connection to the customer, and how much consideration I put into how I word the reading. Even though I know the basic gist of a reading as soon as I turn over the cards (and what you see on this blog are my initial ramblings to myself about my own daily draws), I  spend a lot of time thinking about how I'm going to put the reading into words for my customer. The written format allows me to follow up on things that pop into my head during a reading. I get flashes of insight from many sources during a reading--song lyrics, Bible verses, quotations from books, films, and TV, characters, myths, art, etc -- and in writing, I have the chance to go and get those items - to include an exact quotation, provide a link to a You Tube clip, add images, or anything else that flashes through my mind as a way to communicate the message to the customer to get my message across. I also find written readings superior because the customer has a permanent record of the full reading and does not have to rely on memory. He or she can keep the readings and look at them again and again. The customer can journal about their reading, use it to create lists, use it as the basis for creating a dream board, etc.  In fact most of my readings include suggestions for further thinking, journaling or actions. To me, a reading is just a starting point. Next comes action.  Often in a live reading, neither the reader nor the customer can recall exactly what was said, and that's a shame, in my opinion. I do live and Skype readings, and they have an appealing immediacy and energy and can be very moving and meaningful. The written reading can be equally as powerful, and also provides its own record.

A tarot reading can also be light-hearted, humorous and fun. It can bring both deep insight and a sense of playfulness. In fact, it is when we allow ourselves to be playful that we make our most profound connections.

Today, then,  I continue to think about growing my reading service.  I know the power tarot has to clarify thinking, to galvanize, to empower and to guide. I love being the conduit through which this wisdom comes. I want to do more and more.

If you have ever been touched by anything I have ever said on this blog, if it has entertained you, if you have ever had a reading from me that helped you, if you have never been here before but feel compelled to speak -- say something to me. Email me or comment. I welcome your words.

Charity begins at home

Deck of the Bastard 

Deck of the Bastard is the creation of Tarot by Seven and is a combination of the RWS minors and majors from several very old decks, given a brown patina with faux-grubby borders and your choice of back. It is my favourite cardstock, a sort of linen type of paper that feels very durable and shuffles like a dream. To be honest, I find the whole deck a little too brown for me, but I appreciate the effort and the idea behind it.

Today's card was 6 of Coins, and I interpreted it as how I'm feeling right now (at the mercy of people with more power or authority than me, at the mercy of circumstance with my physical body) and to remember that even if I feel pretty bad, I'm better off than a lot of people, probably most.

What also happened was that my lovely husband went to the shops for me because even though I got myself ready when we started out the door, I felt chills and slightly dizzy and really couldn't face the crowds at Sainsbury's on a Saturday bank holiday weekend. So he went and bought me several cans of soup. Then later, he brought me a blanket on the couch and made his own dinner. That was so nice of him to help me and look after me. It doesn't sound like much but it meant a lot to me. (I did thank him).

Week ahead - Deck of the Bastard

Rough night with dental discomfort/pain and nausea. Let's look at the cards for the next week and try a little predictive reading, then look at them again on each day:

Row 1: Sat Sun Mon
Row 2: Tue Wed Thu

Row 3: Fri

Today - 6 of Pentacles

This is a time when I must assess how much of my neediness in the material plane is down to perception. I feel quite on my knees to/at the mercy of events with regard to my physical body at the moment. I do feel at the mercy of those who seem to have more power over this aspect of my life at the moment; in this case, the dentists. I also feel that I am begging for mercy from a higher source for a good outcome.

It would probably not be a bad idea to get some perspective on events. There are many people in the world much far worse off than me with my dental pain/discomfort but the resources to eventually take care of the problem, even if I have to experience some pain for a few days or weeks, and even if the procedure is not the most pleasant in the world. No matter what happens, the worst case scenario for me is a tooth extraction. My life is not on the line. I'm not looking at chemo or open heart surgery. 

So this card is both an assessment of my current feelings and a call to remember I'm not the only one having troubles and in fact am better off than most.

Sun - Empress

It's hard not read every card in light of my most pressing problems. The Empress here suggests a day in which I should nurture myself in every way possible, mother myself. I should focus on the ways in which I do feel healthy. I should avoid talking about my problems. The Empress is a doer, not a talker. 

Mon - Justice

It's Easter Bank Holiday. It hardly seems fair to me that my dental woes have invariably fallen across weekends when the dentist is closed. Then, it hardly seems fair that the dentist is closed on weekends. A practice open on Saturday would do a booming trade. I can only hope that whatever discomfort I've been in for the last few days has seen a reduction.

In any case, the Justice card doesn't seem a harbinger of doom. Depending on how you number your cards, Justice is my year card. (The numbers of your date of birth added together and reduced is your year card. Mine is 8, which in some decks is Strength, in others Justice. I lay claim to both because my age is 47, 4+7=11, which seemed a coincidence too handy to ignore). 

It could be that Monday will be a day when I must deal dispassionately with the fact that life is impartial in dealing out woes. Or a day when I make connections between events and see the cause and effect. I might reach a solution or decision of some kind. 

Tue - 3 of Pentacles

It's back to work after being off since 11 April, but I must say, it hasn't been an especially fun holiday. There will be so many tasks to catch up on. I am not looking forward to it. I think I will probably be consulting with my manager a lot (if she's in). Team work is called for. 

Wed - The Devil

I think I know what this might point to. I originally booked off half a day's annual leave for this day (hubby asked me to). Should I go ahead and take it? Or should I stay at work for the day? The Devil is about feeling helpless, in bondage, thinking negatively, believing the worst, choosing to remain in ignorance, or any number of bleak concepts. It could be a day that I am tempted to call in sick altogether. But perhaps this could just point to a very busy day at work in which I feel like a slave! 

Thu - Wheel of Fortune

Does the worm begin to turn? Something is going to change on Thursday, anyway. I do hope it's for the better.

Fri - 9 of Cups

This looks hopeful....particularly following on from Devil, to Wheel, to 9 of Cups, as if a low point is reached on the Wednesday but looking better by the Friday. It is generally interpreted as achieving what you desire. I know what I desire as an outcome -- a settled down mouth, no pain, and able to eat without worrying about it. 

I'm going to do each entry for the next week in the evening to see how things actually panned out.

Mysterious sparklies

Bonefire Tarot

This is an attractive image from the Bonefire Tarot, but I'm not entirely sure I understand how it relates to the traditional meanings of the 6 of Coins. It's night time with a giant full moon, star and golden orbs in the sky. Next to the moon, a sun emerges over a green horizon with a bonefire standing watch.  A cow stands in a pool of water. In the foreground, two heads of wheat frame the image, cradling organic-looking growth that remind me of tree roots, and nestled within them are more coins and a crowded section of red sparklies--jewels? berries? innards? Who knows.

Not sure how you get from all that to: 'a small improvement in money, charitable donations, stoic approach to finances, being open to opportunities, altruism versus self-satisfaction.'

As I was typing this, I just heard on the news that at Cabinet meeting last night, the county council has decided to shut 9 libraries. They've already reduced us from 32 libraries to 16 in the last few years. This would take us down to 8 libraries for the whole of this county. Of course, what the implication of this would be for staffing, I cannot say. I am starting my 12-month secondment in a different sector soon. I just got my start date yesterday and it is Monday, 3rd March. That would put me back in the library service March 2015, presumably just when the cuts start. Of course I can't worry about this, as worrying doesn't change anything. I'm sure there will be more details today in my email at work, but I refuse to worry.

In light of this news, 'a stoic approach to finances' and 'being open to new opportunities' shine out in a new light. Whatever happens, the only thing one can do is keep moving forward. Life doesn't end because a job does. That's just a change. That's not the end.

Maybe that cow's about to jump over the moon -- into a new day.

ETA -- MERCURY RETROGRADE ALERT! The news got it wrong this morning. It was not agreed to close any libraries. No library closures. That retrograde. It always gets ya. It's 6-28 Feb, by the way, so be warned.

Circle of stones

Haindl Tarot, Lotus 2002

This week's deck is the very serious and earthy Thoth-based Haindl Tarot  (Haindl, Lotus, 2002). I have the large-size German edition, which I have trimmed of borders and titles and handwritten either Haindl's revised titles or a Golden Dawn/Thoth title on the card.  Haindl created the minor arcana from existing artwork, choosing a detail from one of his earlier paintings, and simply painting the relevant number of pips on top. Each card is marked with an i-ching symbol, which I ignore entirely as I know nothing about the system and have no interest in it. I understand from those in the know that his use of them is idiosyncratic, anyway. The suits are wands, cups, swords and stones (instead of coins/pentacles). The majors and courts were painted specifically for the deck. Majors follow the usual pattern; the courts are Son, Daughter, Father, Mother. I've labelled mine in the more traditional manner of Prince, Princess, Queen, King (using the word 'King' where Crowley uses 'Knight').

Thoth Tarot, Crowley-Harris

Today's card is the 6 of Stones, or 6 of Coins. We see six stones or boulders in a cave of some type. There is water on the cave floor, and a natural path leading to an opening that is filled with daylight. The six stones are arranged around this opening. Looking closer, the top three stones are in a triangle shape, and the bottom three stones are in an upside-down triangle shape. This has a distinct 'as above, so below' feel to it.  In the Thoth Tarot, the 6 of Disks has its pips arranged in a hexagram, too, from the centre of which glows the light of the rosy cross. So it is obvious here that Haindl has taken the original Thoth card and reinterpreted it in earthy imagery, rather than the stark, cold lines of the Crowley-Harris Thoth. It's more or less the same card, though.

image source

Rachel Pollack points out that the two triangles also form the top of the Tree of Life. The centre of the Tree of Life is sometimes called the Abyss, because there appears to be no sephira there. Actually there is, though it's often missing from diagrams or represented by a broken line: Daath. In the Six of Stones, the spot where Daath would be is represented by the glowing light of the cave door. The suggestion in the card, then,  is that the source of wisdom does not have to be separate from the material world. You can enjoy your earthly life and still achieve divine enlightenment. Or as Pollack puts it, 'We can find the true source of meaning within the happiness of daily life.'

In a reading, I would likely interpret this card to mean 'material success', just like it says on the tin, but would also see it as a reminder that success in life can be used to learn deeper lessons, even spiritual ones. The most important one probably being that the little moments of happiness in the day to day are the true keys to understanding our link to the divine. The pleasures of this world can be a gateway to divine connection, an idea which is clearly represented in this card image.

Peace and Plenty

'I still believe that peace and plenty and  happiness can be worked out some way. I am a fool.' ~ Kurt Vonnegut

We see the arm of a jester dropping white spheres into needy little hands in this card from Servants of the Light Tarot, Aquarian Press, 1991. It is the Six of Spheres, or Pentacles. In this deck, the User of Spheres (or Knight of Pentacles) is depicted as a jester, for some reason. He appears in five of the ten cards in the Spheres suit, and three of the court cards. He is called 'another manifestation of the Fool' in the description to the Giver of Spheres. 'He is the Earth Guardian, in many ways akin to Pan. He will walk the earth as its guardian, but alone he cannot do all that he hopes, for he must have the cooperation of humanity,' according to the description of the User of Spheres. It is by the power of the Maiden of Malkuth that he has become Lord of the Earth, it says in the description for Keeper of Spheres. So there's a nice little mystery running through the Spheres suit for one to unravel or meditate upon, should one wish to.

It certainly brings more depth to what appears to be a rather straightforward RWS 6 of Pentacles. I might give something today, I might get something today. Or is it some sort of higher cooperation that will be rewarded today? Could be any or all of these.

May I be open to opportunities to give and receive of earth blessings today. 

Mantra: Om mani padme hum (this mantra helps achieve the 6 practices, from generosity to wisdom)

Flower essence: Chicory (to balance possessiveness, greed, lacking of sympathy; positive aspect is unconditional love)

Sample Super-Quick 3-Card Reading: Aquarian Tarot

A practice reading. Hypothetical querent looking for a general reading. Cold reading.

Aquarian Tarot, US Games 2006 (original 1970)

You seem to have got it in your head that there's no rest for you, that in order to create a decent home life you must constantly be 'doing' for them, sacrificing your time to their needs. You think it's only fair that the family come first and you come last. 

There is another side to 'giving' and a 'happy family' that you aren't seeing. You and your family would likely be more contented if you all spent some time thinking about others and not yourselves. Consider ways that you and your family can act together for the good of someone else. This would prove both relaxing and rewarding to all of you. 

If your first thought is, 'Oh great, here's something I'm going to have to organize and then make my family do,' then you really are mired in backward thinking! Involve them, and see what happens. They might just take the reins and you'll find yourself able to kick back and enjoy. They might even go out and leave you at home to take an actual nap.